The Household Asks for a Dog

1Ross 8:4-22.

4 So all the youngers of the household gathered together with their mother and came to Ross in his study. They said to him, "You are boring, and you do not walk in our ways; now buy a dog to play with us, such as all the other neighbors have."

    6 But when they said, "Buy us a dog to play with us," this displeased Ross; so he prayed to the Lord. And the Lord told him: "Listen to all that the youngers and their mother are saying to you; it is not you they have rejected as their playmate, but me. As they have done from the day I brought them up out of Manhattan until this day, forsaking me and playing with other toys, so they are doing to you. Now listen to them; but warn them solemnly and let them know what the dog who will come among them will do."

10 Ross told all the words of the Lord to the household who were asking him for a dog. He said, "This is what the dog who will come among you will do: He will take your toys and chew them to pieces, and they will fall in ruins from his mouth. He will lie on your furniture and deposit his hairs upon them; your friends will be allergic and will not visit you again. He will not go along on your vacations, and your vacations will be no more, for the dog will require constant attendance and there will be no one to attend him. He will take a tenth of your grain and of your vineyards and spill them upon the floor; he will defecate upon your carpets and urinate upon your rugs. He will take morning and evening walks when your favorite show is on, and you yourselves will become his slaves. When that day comes, you will cry out for relief from the dog you have chosen, and Ross will not answer you in that day."

    19 But the household refused to listen to Ross. "No," they said. "We want a dog with us. Then we will be like all the other neighbors, with a dog to play with us and to go out before us to guard our household."

    21 When Ross heard all that the household said, he repeated it before the Lord. The Lord answered, "Listen to them and give them a dog."

Then Ross said to the household of Rhodes, "Everyone go to your rooms."